FREEDOM! (No Cash Value)

A number of years ago, I had a weird meeting with a strange individual (Rojo Joe) who gave to me a game token… on the front it said “Freedom” and on the back it said “No Cash Value” and that, at the time, was a really, really profound statement made by a game token. (Contrary to what you might be thinking, there were no drugs involved).

I was, at the time, stuck in a relationship situation that was less-than-optimal and had not really given a lot of thought to the concept that I could exercise free will and just, well, walk away.  Yes, it ended up being more complex than that, but in the end, I did realize that I COULD be in charge of my own destiny and I owe it in part to the conversation I had that day and to that little metal token.

I have a 7-year-long obligation that will be wrapping up this weekend.  I’ve typed out and erased the whole story time and again.  And some day… under a pseudonym probably, I will write out the whole story. But it will not be today and will not be here. I will say that I do not believe that the treatment I received was fair or just (this is not anything regarding criminal activity… it’s related to divorce and maintenance, let’s leave it at that).  But the final payment will be paid this weekend… and the Freedom after I stick that payment into the envelope and send it on its way far outweighs any Cash Value.  I get to close a chapter of my life and, quite frankly, if I never hear the word “Minnesota” again in my life, I will be perfectly happy.

I am hoping that not having to make this payment every month will allow me to “let go” and melt at least some of  the bitterness I feel towards my Wasband. I know it isn’t healthy to feel this way, so I am hoping that not being reminded, month-after-month can open the door to being able to close the door on that chapter of my life.

And I hope that, at some point, I come across my “Freedom” token again. I am thinking I want to add it to my necklace. Or at least put it somewhere that I can look at it and have a reminder of what’s important when I get caught up in “how will I pay the bills?” and “how can I get more clients?”

FREEDOM = NO CASH VALUE  – Very True Indeed

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