On Purpose?

I think that everyone, at some point, takes a look at their life and wonders why they’re here in a “big picture” sort of way.  What am I supposed to be doing with my life? What will give my life meaning? What’s my purpose?

I’m someone who has always been defined quite a bit by my work. If I am working and doing well, I feel like I am aligned with my purpose. When I was laid off, I floundered because a big part of myself was always invested in whatever position I was working and now that was gone.

I think that’s one of the things that attracted me to be in business for myself. It was something that someone else couldn’t take away from me. I am Mistress of My Own Fate, for better or for worse and while others may find that terrifying, I really enjoy it.

The joy I get when a client is successful is pretty extraordinary. When I am able to solve a problem or able to come up with a creative solution to a dilemma that my client faces, I feel like I am in my “Zone of Genius”.  When someone comes to me with a situation that they’ve tried and tried to resolve and I wrestle with it and get ALMOST to the point of walking away in frustration and then find the one key missing element that makes it all work, the feeling is beyond what there are words for in our language.

Society is so focused on “what’s in it for me”? And the answer, so much of the time is that directly, there’s really nothing in it for me to solve a problem or to make someone else happy – except that I got to provide a solution and make someone else happy.

Self-Doubt Dragon

An opportunity has come along for me to work with someone I admire greatly. Someone whose work I believe in. Someone who regularly makes me both laugh and cry and nod my head in “Oh My Gosh – YES!” agreement. I am excited. I am a little scared. I am holding the Self-Doubt Dragon at bay. I am in my “Stuart Smalley” loop of “I’m Good Enough. I’m Smart Enough. And, Gosh Darn It, People Like Me”.

(Now if I could only hold the Thinky Thoughts at bay, maybe I could sleep…)