Six years ago today, my friend Christopher passed away. He was only 40 years old.
I’m going to confess that I did not always completely adore him. He lived with us on and off for a number of years and there were times I just wanted my house back. He was good to talk to, though, and when I was able to look beyond the fact that I was supporting an extra person, there was the fact that he did try to help out and often that was more than the Wasband was doing. Plus, it was nice to have someone around to help out with The Girl and basically, he was a 3rd parent to her (meaning that if he was the one home and something went awry, he was to be obeyed just as if he was a parent of hers). I know that sounds really weird, but he was pretty much a fixture in our lives for a long time and The Girl was even there at the hospital when he passed. (Traumatic for a kid who was 16 at the time, but she wanted to be there and I couldn’t think of a reason that she shouldn’t make that choice for herself – to be fair… her Dad – The Wasband – was there, as well as were several other people she’d known pretty much her entire life).
In the years since he has passed, I’ve wondered often if there was something I could have/should have done differently that would have changed the outcome of things. I guess, if I had the chance, that’s the question I’d like to ask him. The last 6 months or so that he was alive, we didn’t talk much but his Mom has said that it wouldn’t have made a difference.
Anyhow, one of the reasons that this came up in my mind today was the fact that there was a project that he and I discussed for many years and it just never came to pass. A combination of not having the resources and the fact that both of us are better in the ‘visionary’ department than ‘implentation’ folks when it comes to things that are huge projects. However, he was actively working on developing the skills needed to eventually make the plan reality. A couple of years ago, I grabbed a domain name related to the project and have been thinking about what I want to do with it, how I can move the dream forward and what would be a fitting tribute to my friend. And that domain name renews this time of year.
I may not be able to fully implement the plan in 2017, but I think it’s time I started mapping out how I’m going to get it done and what it will look like in the end.
You made me strong when I was feeling weak, and we crossed, that one time
Screaming stop signs, staring wild eyes, keep on flashing, flashing by
And we keep driving into the night
It’s a late goodbye, such a late goodbye
~Late Goodbye, Poets of the Fall